Nearly there

All stations go today.  I wanted to get my house clean and tidy (whoops even found the duster), the fridge cleared out, washing and ironing done, bills paid up to date etc etc so that when I come home after my next operation, I don’t have to do anything.

Hmm but as the first thing of the day was making a cup of coffee (not such a difficult task me thinks), but I put the kettle on, coffee in the cup, poured the water in, added the milk (the final bit from the fridge), stirred it all up and put it to my lips following which I realised that it was cold… oops I neglected to notice that the kettle was cold and the water wasn’t steaming!   Doh!

Still jobs to do and lunch with my Dad and his wife.  We had a lovely lunch and both of them were very sympathetic but I’m always anxious about worrying Dad with what’s going on.  I’ve noticed that when he gets anxious he gets more forgetful and slower – I don’t want to cause him anymore anguish.  Love him and love his hugs.

Jobs done, fire lit, settling down to a bit of TV and an early night.  I’m watching How to Look Good Naked on Channel 4 TV at the moment.  The subject of the show is someone who has had a mastectomy following breast cancer.  All her insecurities I can understand as I think I’ve thought them but need to resolve them, as I’m sure she will with the help of Gok Wan and no doubt many many others.

Gosh one of the things I truly miss with all this, is a huge great big hug.  But as it hurts when anyone is near my breast and certainly couldn’t cope with being squished I can’t ask for one.  And people are so (sweetly) cautious of me I don’t get so many offered.  Sounds daft but there’s nothing quite like a good comforting hug and I can’t have one!

2 more sleeps to go and I’m aware that I’m getting more and more anxious…. think my heart rate is going through the roof… bring on the pre-meds!

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