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I’m surprised at how badly I slept last night. I’m obviously more anxious about this trip than I’m letting on… even to myself!

There’s been such a lot of expectation, by me, about the Conference, to answer questions, get reassurances, share and listen to survivors’ stories, learn more about living with cancer and attending workshops and seminars.

For me, I want to learn a million things but the main few are:

  • How to realise I have a future and not just plan for the now.
  • How to feel comfortable with my new body image and feel that although I look different and am scarred that I can accept the new me… and maybe one day be able to be OK with a new partner seeing me too.
  • How to use my experiences to help others without dwelling on my personal issues.
  • How to eat better and be healthier and use natural foods to manage and keep cancer away.
  • How to be an inspiration to others both in my attitude, outgoing and learnings.

I’m also acutely aware at how incredibly blessed I am to have been able to attend this Conference. From learning about it’s existence via new and wonderful Phyllodes sisters that I’ve met online, to friends’ assistance with the cost of the trip, to the support from so many known and unknown people who read my journey online and send supportive messages.

I believe that I’m the only attendee from the UK – they’ll be able to spot me, I’ll be the only one thinking its summer and behaving with a little British reserve (NOT)!

I’m also aware that this sort of event sets out (although I may revise that after attending) to be an invaluable meeting for survivors of breast cancers, allowing us to be at ease with our queries, questions and concerns and share our learnings with others who have or are going through the same things. Suddenly, we’re not alone any more – and I truly can’t express how much that simple statement means.

It would be incredible if we could make this event accessible to all… wherever they live geographically… but cost of travel and accommodation are often prohibitive… BUT right now, I’m fired up to believe that this sort of event to be hosted in the UK or Europe would be amazing and I’d love love love to be part of, or instrumental in, organising this event in the UK. I know that there’s a need for it… so who’s going to help me do it?

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