Cancer Research – “Your Say, Your Day, Your CRUK” event

Today’s excitement was that I have been invited to attend a Cancer Research UK event in London.  10 other similar events are taking place around the UK simultaneously with the hope that together we (at all 11 events) will provide Cancer Research with valuable input with regard to more patient/carer engagement in research together with policy and campaigning.

In London there were approximately 100 patient/carers in attendance and I was really pleased to note that Cancer Research had been able to get a good balance of men, women, older, younger, working, not working and different stages of cancer diagnosis/treatment/remission.  I’m always very aware that often the people who dedicate time to attend these events are often those who are no longer working and often older – we need to get more younger participants so that the views of young adults, new parents etc are also represented.  But Cancer Research appear to have done this today!

IMG_3998Having just made that point all girls in this pic!

The day’s agenda is focusing mainly on two main discussions (below) followed by a talk by Professor Bob Brown, Head of Division of Cancer and Chair in Translational Oncology at Imperial College.  Then (thanks to technology) a message broadcast to all locations by Harpal Kumar, Chief Executive of Cancer Research UK.

The first discussion – Involving people affected by cancer in research.  On our table it was a lively discussion leading to our facilitator writing super fast to take down all the notes.  We divided the discussion into three main categories:

  • What patients could be involved in
  • Helping to train researchers in how to talk to patients
  • What motivates people to be involved.

In summary (and believe me this post would be pages long if I put it all down), we said that we believed patients/carers should be involved in everything Cancer Research did.  We asked that there should be more of an open dialogue between the organisation and patient/carers.  We could help with reviewing documentation, website, information and also media.  Don’t assume that patients won’t want to be involved, have an opinion or perhaps enhance the services and products.  We advised that patient/carers can provide input at meetings, events and in person but also by email or via online surveys and forums.  This additional way would allow people who aren’t able to leave the house to also provide their input.  Could the researchers/scientists provide more information to the patient/carers about what they do?  Perhaps tours of research facilities.  Leaflets and newsletters with updates.  We also asked if results could be published… even for projects that didn’t complete or failed.  Collaborative working between the researchers and the users… think of it like translational research!  If we can take research from the lab bench to the patient bedside then we should consider the same for patient/carer involvement.

We suggested that patients/carers who were advocates or past clinical trial patients could train utilise their experiences to train others.  Nurses and doctors could understand the patient journey with regard to clinical trials.  What they had been worried about.  What could have been explained differently or in more/or less detail.  What their experience was and why it was important to them to participate.  We felt that these people could also be part of a video/tv campaign to educate the public about clinical trials.  Not just the ones that include taking medicines or drugs but also those that mean tissue samples being sent from operations or perhaps completing surveys or research about side effects etc.  So many people, until they need to understand, don’t come into contact with clinical trials and therefore many just remember the ‘elephant man’ trial a few years ago and assume this risk for all.  Utilising the patient/carer message could dispel this myth and many more and encourage people to always consider a trial as part of their medical journey (if available).

Patient/carers input needs to be valued.  After all, all these people were also someone before they were diagnosed or cared for someone who was.  Maybe worth remembering that in one chemo ward an organisation may have all the skills they need for the whole project AND now they all have first hand experience too!

What motivates people to get involved?  In the most part the answer is usually because they have been affected by  cancer.  However it can’t always be assumed that this is the case as often it may be more altruistic.

Everyone needs to be realistic and understand the requirements on the participants.  Perhaps they have time but don’t have energy.  Perhaps they have a great deal of time at the moment but know they have treatment coming up.  Perhaps they want short term assignments or to help remotely.  Ask.  Ask the participant and also build rapport so that they don’t feel overwhelmed or ‘put upon’.  We discussed that usually you get a better response and longer involvement.

The second part of our day regarded ‘Involving people affected by cancer in policy and campaigning’.

Something that was raised in the earlier part of the day was that patients and carers should be involved in deciding WHAT is to be campaigned for and what policies were prioritised.  We felt it was a little patronising to be told what we should be campaigning for without knowing that there was sufficient patient/carer input at the start of the discussion.  After all if it was something we were passionate about, would we not then put more emphasis on getting the message heard?

We asked for training, support and feedback for all participating.  For many public speaking is part of their career however for some talking about something so personal can be difficult.  Perhaps as part of the training use other patient/carers who have previously spoken publicly to talk about their experiences, how they overcame their nerves, what they felt got the point over etc.

We also felt that it was important for Cancer Research to publicise more the work they do with regard to influencing policy and campaigning.

This posting is only part of what was discussed and Cancer Research have also put together a blog with some more of the points raised.  Do post any feedback or comments on their page.

In London, we were also treated to a performance by the Combination Dance Company – Code.  Code are preparing a performance project that will be seen throughout the UK which will, through dance, words and music, tell a story about cancer and particularly research.  Do keep an eye out for Code where you are.  In the meantime you can follow their progress on Facebook and Twitter.

Research interviews

I was invited to undertake some research for a pharmaceutical company.  I’m not sure which one but was delighted to be asked, particularly as all the participants they asked are all cancer patients who have been diagnosed within the past 4 years and consider themselves currently in remission.  I fit all categories and was interested to hear the questions to understand what they wanted to know.

An hour of questions.  Predominently about the level of information, support and services available to me before, during and after my diagnosis.  Where did I seek information?  What sort of information did I find?  What would I have liked etc?

Importantly the interview went on to ask about what I would have liked to have found.  Where I would have liked to have found it.  What would improve the information.

I was able to speak not only from my personal experience but also using anecdotes that I’ve gleaned from all the people I’ve met online and in person.  I hope I was able to represent a number of people (and their carers and families) with the input I gave.

Overall I was pleased that a pharmaceutical company was looking for patient/carer engagement.  Our views.  Our opinions.  Our experiences etc.  Let’s hope the information provided and gleaned from my answers and other attendees will guide the pharmaceutical company to improve their services or indeed change the method of their delivery.

Bunkfest 2013 – Wallingford

Finally, I made it to Bunkfest. Well at least the Sunday part of the festival anyway.

995407_155710437954902_1753213964_nExtraordinary community festival. Lots going on. Probably too many Morris Dancers for my taste but hey, I found the beer tent and the main stage! Crafting tents for small people, dancing (not just Morris-style), local choirs, plenty of stalls, food outlets, many bands (lots local) and an inordinate amount of tie-dye!

But the best part was the sun was shining and the festival was just a great excuse to catch up with some ex-colleagues and friends in the area.

My Proms 2013

I’m truly dreadful. I live a bus ride and short walk away from the Albert Hall. I have no reason not to, every year, attend more of the Proms season. Yet, in reality it creeps up and escapes before I’ve had time to devour the programme.

This year in February, at a party in Winchester, a friend promised that he’d let me know when he and his wife reviewed he programme and considered which concert(s) to attend. In May and true to his word, I received an email inviting me to join a party of Promenaders.

IMG_3989We started at the Cadogan Hall with a concert of Chamber Music and Saturday Matinees.

Britten – Simple Symphony (17 mins)
Tippett – Little Music for Strings (11 mins)
Britten – Elegy for strings (8 mins)
 World Premiere
Britten – Lachrymae (15 mins)
Walton – Sonata for Strings (27 mins)

The pieces were played by the extraordinary musicians of Camerata Nordica. Incredible, energetic performance from them all but with particular admiration to the violin/director Terje Tønnesen. We also all commented how the energy was perhaps enhanced as the musicians remained on their feet for the whole performance. Wonderful.

I also think a special mention should be made for Cadogan Hall. I must have walked around with my eyes closed for 20+ years as I’d never noticed this stunning building nestling behind Sloane Square. Truly impressive and worth a visit .

We then chatted and walked to Beauchamp Place where a reservation for an early supper had been made at Maroush. We chose to all have the set menu of hot mezze dishes together with Lebanese wines. Hummus, aubergine dip, spicy sausages, tabbouleh, vine leaves and lamb parcels, were eaten first. All very fresh and delicious. Then followed some grilled meats and the most succulent lamb and rice. Seriously the lamb was just falling off the bone.. sooo good! Followed by a plate of fresh exotic fruits and a few pieces of sticky baklava. Just the perfect meal to keep us going for our evening ahead.

A brisk 15 minute walk to the Albert Hall to carry on with our day of Promenading.

IMG_3984The evening’s programme, Prom 65, was a programme very much of two parts. The first being made up of pieces from War films. Through a number of the pieces I remembered rainy afternoons as a child watching these films with my Dad.

Addinsell – Warsaw Concerto (from ‘Dangerous Moonlight’) (10 mins)
Alwyn – The True Glory – March (3 mins)
Bennett – Lady Caroline Lamb – suite (17 mins)
Lucas – Ice Cold in Alex – March (3 mins)
Walton – Battle of Britain – excerpts (11 mins)

The second part of the programme was ‘The Sound of Outer Space” with music from space and science-fiction titles, including ‘2001: A Space Odyssey’, ‘Alien’, ‘Independence Day’, ‘Star Wars’ and ‘Superman’

The whole day was truly fabulous. So very grateful for friends that do the organising for me!

“Three Tits on Tour” in Verona

I’ve just returned from an incredible weekend in Verona, Italy. Those of you who know me well, know my love of Opera, travel and architecture. So Verona offers the perfect combination.

Add to that great company, a lot of laughs, good food and friendships then you’ve just about summed up our weekend.

Verona 20132 generalFor many many years I’ve had Opera in Verona on my ‘to do list’. Mum and I talked about going. I’ve discussed going with friends. But somehow it’s always seemed out of reach as I’d been told how expensive it was and how accommodation was almost impossible to get during the Opera season. Why I ever listened to anyone, I’m not now sure… but at the beginning of 2013 I booked my flights and then sent an email to a few girlfriends to invite them to join me. Two wonderful friends, Ismena and Kelly, booked flights and emailed me back to say they were ‘in’. I think now that my years of delay in going to Verona were so that I could make the trip with Issy and Kelly.

DSCN0568The three of us have been friends for such a short period of time in our lives. However the reason we met was because of cancer and with that bond there is an intensity of a shared experience and friendship that means months and year counts don’t really matter.

I remember seeing How to Look Good Naked, the Gok Wan show, a few days before my second surgery was due. (How to Look Good Naked Part I and Part II) As you will know from this website my surgeon had suggested I prepare for the possibility that I may need a mastectomy. Kelly’s experience on the show, coupled with my reading Lisa Lynch’s book The C Word and Janice Day’s book Getting it off my chest were all part of my preparation and journey.

Little could I have imagined then that I would soon meet all three of these incredible ladies.

Sadly Lisa passed away earlier this year. Too soon. Too young. I miss her funny and poignant twitter posts in my timeline but I can still hear her mischevious laugh!

Issy and I, despite having a mutual friend met via Shine Cancer Support and subsequently discovered that we live a few minutes apart. What I also didn’t know was that on Issy’s ‘List for Living’ she wanted to see an Opera in Verona.

The three of us met up on Thursday afternoon at Gatwick and headed for the plane. Kelly confessed to being an opera virgin… and both Issy and I felt that by the end of the weekend Kelly would be converted!

A quick flight with BA however was marred a little by lack of organisation and wheelchair assistance particularly at Verona airport.  We eventually arrived at our accommodation and were warmly welcomed.  Quick to settle in to our fabulous Arena B&B we then set out in search of a light dinner, a glass of bubbles and an early night! What a fabulous find Arena B&B is. Literally 5 minutes wander to the Arena and the main square. Truly couldn’t be better placed. Affordable, friendly, clean AND best placed. Perfect. During our stay they were incredibly accommodating as Issy was exhausted after recent hospital visits and needed to rest on Friday during the day. They were also kind enough to get extra pillows and allow us to keep the room on our final day in case Issy needed a rest before flying home. Really exceptional and considerate service.

After breakfast on the balcony together on Friday morning, Kelly & I headed out to explore Verona. We walked and wandered down alleyways, across squares, through arches and over bridges. An exquisite historic city full of beautiful architecture and secret spots to explore. We might have stopped for a little gelati in the afternoon and perhaps a little lunch with bubbles!

IMG_3993After a short rest at the B&B, scrub up and beautify, the 3 of us headed out for a bite to eat before the main event for the day – Rigoletto in the Arena.

IMG_3991For this evening’s performance we had booked cheaper seats on the stone steps higher up the Arena. Still perfect for the ambiance and view of the stage but we were very grateful to our B&B for lending us cushions to sit on! What a performance! Perhaps not the best opera for Kelly’s first as it’s a little darker and deeper than others but certainly an introduction in an incredible setting. Late in the night the breeze got up and the odd exchange of glances took place between us as we envisaged the weather coming in and us getting soaked high up in the Arena. Little did we imagine that during the interval part of the set would be blown over! The interval was therefore longer whilst the stage hands set about fixing it. The oddest thing happened… well perhaps for an Opera venue. A Mexican wave was started… and the orchestra joined in! Hilarious.

Verona 20134 bridge Ponte Scaligero, VeronaWe woke up to another sunny and glorious day in Verona. Breakfast on the balcony amongst the vines. Then the three of us set out in search of the little City Sightseeing bus. A great way to see the sites, with tourguide in our ears and, if we’d chosen a hop-off/on option too.  Our blue route was perfect… and we’d also worked out that if we alighted by Juliet’s balcony we could stop at a restaurant, Antico Caffe Dante, that our B&B had recommended for a long lunch. I in turn cannot recommend this restaurant highly enough. Truly exceptional food of the highest calibre. The restaurant is set in Piazza dei Signori, romantically known as the ‘Drawing Room of Verona’, which is slightly away from the hustle and bustle of the main squares.

After lunch, Issy headed off back to the B&B.  Kelly & I headed up the Torre dei Lamberti, a tall medieval bell tower. Stunning views of the City and beyond from the top… however we truly did jump when the bell rang!!

IMG_3990A short rest and scrub up before a quick snack and then the biggest performance of our trip. Aida.

Not just any performance nor any date. We are not only attending opera in Verona during the Festival dei Centenario (100 years of opera in the Arena) BUT it is also Verdi’s 100th birthday year. Tonight’s performance is even more special as they are recreating the Aida performance given 100 years ago!

IMG_3992The entire Arena was packed. More seats have been created farther around the Arena and near the stage. The excitement as we took our seats (posh ones lower down the Arena!). Candles were lit by those attending the performance to recreate the atmosphere 100 years ago when there was no electricity and the public would light a candle to illuminate the Arena and stage. Now it is used to signify our presence at the event unique to the world.

DSCN0661 DSCN0664Beautiful spellbinding performance that captured and drew us all in. The costumes, stage and music were an incredible tribute to Verdi’s opera. Amazing.

Fair to say that Kelly is now an opera convert too!

Sunday was spent with another long lunch, a little sightseeing, gelati, prosecco and laughter before our flight home. Fabulous.

Castelvecchio, Verona Verona 20133sculptureOh, one more thing… Late one night this weekend we realised that because of cancer related surgeries there were only three breasts between us… hence ‘3 tits on tour’!

Next overseas adventure for 3 tits on tour – La Traviata in La Scala – http://www.abitofaboob.com/where-are-you-alfredo/

Birthday celebrations

My younger brother and his family have headed South to meet up with the family and celebrate some birthdays.  Dad is a slightly larger number than my youngest niece!  However sometimes they enjoy the same silliness!

The sun shone too so we were able to be outside on the terrace for lunch.  We managed a few games of giant Jenga, croquet and hide and seek.  Great fun and it’s always so special to watch the cousins play together – I took this when they were all lying on the ground giggling… love them!

1098011_10151552593801003_437185770_n

I also love it when I hear Dad chatting away to each of them.  He comes alive when they’re around.

The Drowned Man: A Hollywood Fable

A week ago I answered my phone to a very excited Godmother.  She had read Charles Spencer’s review in the Telegraph of a new ‘show’ called The Drowned Man.  One of the reasons she stated she was excited was that Charles Spencer rarely rates a play with five stars or is so exuberant in his praise.  After attempting to tell me about the show – ‘it’s immersive theatre’, ‘story in a Hollywood studio’, ‘you wander through the story’, ‘there’s murder and intrigue’ etc etc, I thought better of trying to understand it and said we should go.

We did.  Yesterday evening.IMG_3947

My review however will read somewhat differently to that of Mr Spencer.  We arrived punctually at 5pm and were handed a white plastic ghost mask which we were told to wear throughout our ‘experience’.  As the weather was warm and close, soon I would feel sweat dripping down the inside of my mask – nice!

I led the way into the venue (the old GPO building at Paddington).  With every step forward the light got dimmer and the black walls more imposing.  The music grew louder – although perhaps we should call it noise.  Within seconds I felt my Godmother reach for my hand.  It was more than a little unnerving not being able to see and to choose to walk forward into the darkness, unsure of what was next.

After being herded into a lift and then deposited on another floor, we spend the next 3 hours wandering round semi-lit floors.  There were Western bars, old caravans, cars, wig and prosthetic rooms, a bath with a naked man in it, deserts, fountains, dressing rooms and so much more.  Some of the sets were filled with suitable smells ie antiseptic in the medical room, oil around the car, stale cigarettes in bars etc.  Certainly the set design team must be given huge credit for their work.

Short vignettes played out over the four floors of sets or studios.  The background noises were so loud we were unable to hear any of the spoken word from the actors and we wondered if there was a story to the ‘show’ at all?  We saw a murder, we saw rows and fights, we saw a birthday party and jealous rages, we saw line dancing and love, we heard laughter and screaming and we saw nudity and sexuality. We felt at times voyeuristic and at other times like it was purely for the hype.  We followed noise or light.  We followed actors between sets.  We also saw other spectators read scripts, notes, letters, posters, ‘clues’ throughout the four floors and disappointingly we saw spectators pocket items from the sets or examine contents of prop purses a little too closely!

It was interesting.  I’m pleased to have done it.  It was quirky and perhaps it will become, as Charles Spencer says, a ‘cult hit’ but I’m not really sure why it should.

I wouldn’t go again nor would I recommend it to others.  I felt the ticket price, at £47.50, was too much and the information too little about what to expect.

Colour in my life

Until this week I’d not really connected anxiety and colour in my life.  However, whilst I painted the final coat of colour to a garden shed I finally realised what I’ve been doing.  As many of you know I’ve had bright red hair at different times.  Often at times of anxiety such as the passing of a dear friend, Mum being ill and then at her passing.  Since then my health has reflected in colourful hair or colour in my garden!

I figured you’ve got a number of my pictures with red hair in the header of this website.  So here’s a few of the garden… the yellow shed having been painted whilst waiting for these latest results!  Hey, I clearly need colour in my life during moments of anxiety…

PS  Sheds were made by my brother’s company Bulldog Sheds & Fencing

PPS Paints were mixed and purchased from Crown Decorator Centre using Crown aluminium primer, Crown undercoat and Macpherson gloss (coloured accordingly).

Follow up appointment

This morning I attended the breast cancer clinic for an appointment following my recent biopsy.  As in the previous posting the pathology indicated that the ‘dots’ weren’t anything to worry about.  However I felt that I needed to understand why they had ‘suddenly’ appeared (they weren’t on previous mammogram); what they really are; are they connected to the sporadic breast pain; and, of course, truly believe that they weren’t the start of something more sinister.

She explained that the dots were calcifications which are small spots of calcium salts.  Calcifications develop naturally as breast tissue ages however can also form if there’s been an infection in or injury to, the breast.  The concern though is that sometimes they  form because of other changes in the breast such as a cyst or fibroadenoma or as an early sign of breast cancer.   (Breast Cancer Care have a leaflet which explains in more detail – here)

Because of my history of malignant phyllodes (which initially biopsied as benign fibroadenoma) and of DCIS all of which were removed in 2009, there was a concern that these new dots may well be indicating something awry.  Fortunately the pathology and consultants believe that these are purely calcium salt spots ie nothing to worry about.  That said, they were keen to ensure that I continued with my regular check up regimen so that any changes will be picked up early.

Next screening scans are booked in for January 2014… Bubbles anyone?

Biopsy phone call

What a caring service I’ve received at Royal Marsden already.  This was continued this morning when one of the breast care nurses phoned to let me know the results of the pathology and to spare me another anxious weekend.

The pathology has indicated that the little dots are calcifications and are benign.  With consultation with the breast cancer team they have also concluded that the horrid biopsy took out enough of the new ‘dots’ to be able to feel that they are all of a similar nature and therefore nothing to be concerned about.  No surgery, no chemo and no radiotherapy.  She also explained that as I was already being monitored on a 6 monthly basis because of my phyllodes sarcoma, they were satisfied that should the ‘dots’ do anything odd they would be picking it up early in any event.  Great news.

I will, however, still be attending the follow up appointment on Monday in order to clarify in my mind why these ‘dots’ have appeared so quickly and reconfirm that all is OK.

Life lesson – I also realised today that I’m a creature of habit… when I am anxious or have stress in my life, I need colour… will post a picture of my newly colourful shed shortly!